The video call rings. It’s Papaia’s cousin.
Papaia
Hey, cousin… long time no see!
Cousin
Hey! How’s it going?
Papaia
All good. You?
Cousin
I’ve found a job on a farm in Australia.
Papaia
Australia? That’s on the other side of the world!
Cousin
Sure is! Look at this place…
His cousin turns the phone around, showing Papaia the countryside: sunshine, green fields, and a fenced enclosure full of cows.
Papaia
Amazing! And are you enjoying it?
Cousin
Yeah, and I’ve got a great deal for you, Papaia.
Papaia
Really? What kind of deal?
Igor walks over to the phone, notebook already in hand.
Cousin
See these cows? They’re up for sale.
Papaia
Oh, yeah? And how much can they make you?
Cousin
Here’s the good news: up to two million each.
Papaia
Two million? Seriously?
Igor starts writing in his notebook.
Cousin
Absolutely. I’d buy them myself if I had the money.
Papaia
And how much do they cost?
Cousin
Just six thousand euros each. Can you believe it? I wish I could afford them myself.
Papaia
Interesting…
After a long conversation about cows, Papaia hangs up.
Papaia
What do you think, colleagues?
Igor
You could give each one the name of a different tax. Like VAT, property tax…
Papaia ignores him and decides to buy the cows remotely.
A few days later, Papaia is finalising the purchase over the phone.
Papaia
Right… I’m ready to make the payment.
Cousin
Okay. I’ll send you the bank details right away.
Papaia
Don’t we need some paperwork?
Cousin
Yes, but we’ll register them in my brother-in-law’s name. He’s local, so you won’t have to pay all those extra foreigner taxes. Otherwise, it’s not worth it anymore.
Igor
(eavesdropping on the call)
Who exactly are you doing this for? Yourself or the cows?
Papaia
Ah, I see…
Papaia pays twenty thousand euros, including a four-thousand-euro discount, for six cows. Then he goes back to work, full of hopes for his future profits.
When the summer holidays arrive, Papaia travels to Australia with his family to see the cows.
At the farm, his cousin greets them with a big, warm hug.
His cousin takes them on a tour of the farm. Papaia’s daughters are delighted to see all the different animals.
Younger Daughter
Look, Daddy! A little dog!
Older Daughter
Look, there’s a horse!
Papaia and his cousin chat about this and that, but there’s no sign of any cows.
Papaia
So, how are the cows doing?
Cousin
Cows? Which cows?
Papaia
The ones we bought! How much have they made?
Cousin
Erm… oh, those…
Papaia
Where are they?
Cousin
Erm… there’s something I need to tell you… You see, the weather’s been terrible this year… the cows died in the drought…
Papaia
What?! I’d paid twenty thousand euros!
Cousin
Ah… well, we used that money to pay off the mortgage on the farm.
Papaia opens his mouth to say something, but his daughters arrive.
Younger Daughter
Daddy, I’ve seen the little rabbits!
Older Daughter
This place is amazing! Thanks for bringing us here!
Cousin
(taking advantage of the distraction)
Come on, let’s go inside. Lunch is ready.
Younger Daughter
What’s for lunch?
Cousin
Do you like hamburgers?
Igor
Yeah, especially when you’ve paid twenty thousand euros for them.