Three scientists—Papaia, Banani, and Ravioli—and their assistant Igor, who are supposed to attend the famous dark matter conference, board the wrong flight and end up on the other side of the world. After arriving at the wrong airport, they book a hotel for the night, but it’s not exactly what they expected… in the sense that it’s terrible.
We are on the hotel stairs.
After a nightmarish night filled with bad dreams, the four are ready to leave their room.
Ravioli: Ah! What a terrible night!
Banani: I barely slept at all, but on the bright side, I finished reading that study on the New Testament.
Igor: Yeah, we all noticed you didn’t sleep—especially our phones, since you kept calling everyone all night!
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Ravioli: So? What do you think?
Igor: I think he should take some pills!
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Ravioli: Igor, I meant about the study, not his insomnia!
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Igor: Oh. Well, in that case, he should take even more pills!
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Banani: I think we can trust the testimonies given in the Gospels, even though I still struggle to believe the supernatural events they describe.
Ravioli: I think we shouldn’t close our minds. Not just because we can’t rule out the existence of the spiritual dimension beforehand.
Papaia: But if God really sent His Son—that is, the second person of the Trinity—to die on that cross, why would He do it?
Banani: Yeah, that’s an interesting question. Why go through all that trouble for us?
Ravioli: I’ve heard people say He died for our sins.
Papaia: Yes, but how?
Banani: Ravioli, you have internet. Why don’t you look it up?
Ravioli: Okay, I’ll check it.
Banani: Hey! Those strange noises from the elevator are gone!
Papaia: Maybe they fixed it. Let’s try calling it!
Igor: Oh, of course! Because if there’s one thing we can always count on at the Sunflowerr Hotel, it’s that things magically start working for no reason…
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… and this scares me more than the clerk’s baseball bat.
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As they press the button, everyone holds their breath. After a moment of silence, they hear the metallic sounds of the elevator starting to move.
Banani (with a triumphant smile): I can’t believe it! It actually works!
Ravioli, still holding onto his suitcase, watches the elevator slowly descend in disbelief.
Ravioli: Well, at least something is going right.
Igor: That’s what worries me. From my travels with Papaia, I’ve learned that the real problem is when there isn’t even a problem. Things are going so badly that we can’t even imagine how!
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….Hey! Wait a moment! I have to write this down! I’ll call it: The Uncertainty Theorem of Igor.
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Here what Igor wrote down that day.
Igor’s Uncertainty Theorem
Statement:
In any situation where things are going terribly wrong, the true nature of the problem remains incomprehensible until we are already beyond our ability to anticipate it.
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Mathematical Formulation:
Let X be the set of all possible problems we might encounter in a situation. The probability distribution of the severity of these problems can be expressed as P(X), where X represents different levels of severity (from minor issues to catastrophic problems).
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Let S(X) represent the “state of the situation” at any given moment, and let P(S) be the probability that the situation has reached a certain level of severity.
Now, define U(S) as the “uncertainty” or the unknown potential for escalation within the situation.
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… Mathematically, this is expressed as:
U(S) = lim (t → ∞) (P(S) – P(S|X))
Where:
P(S) is the current severity of the situation.
P(S|X) is the predicted severity of the situation based on the current set of observed problems X.
As t → ∞, the probability of accurately predicting the severity decreases due to the increasing number of unforeseen variables causing the situation to worsen.
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Key Result:
As the situation worsens, the uncertainty U(S) increases, meaning the more we try to predict what’s going wrong, the less accurate our predictions become,
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… reaching a point where the severity of the problem is simply beyond any calculation or understanding.
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… This “unpredictability” is central to the very nature of Igor’s theorem.
Conclusion:
Thus, Igor’s Uncertainty Theorem states that when things go so wrong that we can no longer understand them, the level of the problem will always exceed our capacity for comprehension or prediction.
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