The evangelists wrote the gospels! Part 2

In the first part…

In the first post on the authorship of the Gospels, we have seen that the Gospels are internally anonymous: the author’s name appears in the title but not in the text. We have also seen the historical evidence connecting the Gospels to the traditional authors: Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. Finally, we have seen that sceptics think that’s a conspiracy. According to that, the Gospels were used as Scripture in the churches of the second century, but no one knew who had written them. Until one day, some church fathers decided to attribute them to the traditional authors.

Long ago, in an alternative past, in the second century, the four church fathers: Papaya, Sireneus, Clementinus, and Tortellinus, hold a secret meeting to solve a serious problem.
Papaya: "The Gospels are anonymous!"
Sireneus: "That's not possible! Are you sure?"
Papaya: "I've searched everywhere in the text! The authors' names are missing!"
Clementinus: "Oh, no! Maybe illiterate shepherds wrote them!"
Tortellinus: "We must do something!"
Papaya: "I have an idea! Why don't we give authors to the Gospels ourselves?"
Their servant Igor enters with a tray and serves them coffee.
Igor: "Have you looked for the authors in the titles?"
Papaya: "Shut up! Don't interrupt our important meeting!"
Igor could finally explain why their sermons contained so many... jokes!

The Gospels follow the style of the time.

How do we explain these omissions? To answer that question we must consider that the Gospels follow the style of Greco-Roman biography. That was the most common style for biographies at that time. In this type of work, omitting the author’s name was the standard procedure. We can see examples like:

Josephus in “Antiquities of the Jews”,
Julius Caesar in “Commentaries on the Civil War”,
Polybius in “Diodorus”,
Philo in the biographies of Abraham, Joseph, and Moses,
Xenophon in “Anabasis”,
Plutarch in the “Parallel Lives”.
Authors like Salas, Livy, Tacitus, Porphyry, Philostratus, Nepos also used this practice in their works.

After a good coffee, the discussion continues…
Sireneus: "Excuse me, but how did illiterate shepherds write the Gospels if they were illiterate?"
Papaya: "The shepherds invented the stories, and the scribes wrote them down!"
Igor: "Almost all authors of the time did that…"
Clementinus: "Right, Igor! They wrote stories invented by shepherds!"
Igor: "No! They omitted their names!"
Tortellinus: "Stop it, Igor! You're wasting our time!"
Sireneus: "Wait! Maybe Igor is right! We should read the Gospels this time… without skipping the titles!"
Clementinus: "Hey! We have too much to do to read the Gospels!"
Tortellinus: "Especially because it's lunchtime, and we've booked at Sergio's!"
Igor thinks to himself: "They're definitely right about that! They're so dull that the thing they do best, is… to eat!"

All manuscripts have the same titles.

Whenever an intact manuscript is found, including the oldest ones, the titles are always the same. There are only two variants: the extended form: “Gospel According to”, plus the author’s name, or the abbreviated form: “According to”, plus the author’s name. Therefore, we can assume that the Gospels have always had these titles.

The four fathers go to the restaurant "The Spaghetted Tomato," where the owner Sergio seats them. Igor accompanies them, holding their coats. While they wait to be served, the discussion continues.
Papaya: "Speaking of titles... I've heard that manuscripts have a wide variety of titles...".
Sireneus: "Who told you that?".
Papaya: "I don't remember exactly...".
Sergio arrives with the menus: "Welcome back! Today we have a wide variety of spaghetti...".
Tortellinus reads the menu: "Spaghetti with tomato, spaghetti without tomato, tomato with spaghetti, tomato without... spaghetti?".
Papaya: "But what kind of variety is that? It's always the same dish!".
Sergio: "Sorry, but I ran out of ingredients...".
Igor chuckles and thinks: "The variety of the Gospels' titles are as wide as the variety of spaghetti in Sergio's menu!"

The narrator always speaks in the third person.

A common feature of that style is that the author talks about himself by using the third person. We also see that happening in the Gospels. The best example is the Gospel of Matthew, that is written entirely in the third person. This makes the Gospels similar to many other works of the time, written in the Greco-Roman biography style. Works like:

Xenophon, Anabasis 3.1.4,
Josephus, The Jewish Wars, 3.8.7,
Julius Caesar, The Gallic Wars.

The lunch is over, and the fathers are still talking:
Papaya: "Have you ever noticed that authors always write in the third person?".
Sireneus: "It's true! They should use the first person when referring to themselves!".
Clementinus: "This, of course, proves that they are not talking about themselves!".
Igor: "Actually, it's possible for someone to speak or write about themselves in the third person!".
Meanwhile, Sergio has brought the bill. Today it's Tortellinus's turn to pay.
Tortellinus: "What you are saying is impossible, Igor! I'll prove it to you now...".
Tortellinus takes a pen and writes on the bill: "Tortellinus won't pay today!". Suddenly, the created paradox causes Tortellinus to disappear into thin air! 
While Sergio remains astonished, the three fathers promptly escape through the bathroom window.
So Sergio grabs Igor by the arm: "Their trick may have worked! But now you stay here... to wash the dishes!"

The authorship was affirmed by third parties.

Let’s consider the works of Plato, Socrates and Aristoteles. Those works are also internally anonymous, but no one would doubt that Plato, Socrates and Aristoteles wrote them. This happens because, for these works authorship is proven by an uninterrupted chain of evidence. That is there are multiple witnesses confirming their authorship, through time. This is also happens for the Gospels, where multiple witnesses confirm Gospels authorship. Those are:

Papias (125 AD),
Justin Martyr (150 AD),
Muratorian Canon (170 AD),
Irenaeus (180 AD),
Clement of Alexandria (180 AD),
Tertullian (207 AD).

In the secret room, the meeting resumes… 
Papaya: "Certainly, since the authors' names are missing, we'll never know who wrote the Gospels.".
Igor interrupts: "Excuse me, but everyone knows who wrote them…". 
Igor lists some of the evidence of the Gospels authorship. The four are amazed, but they become distracted thinking about how delicious Sergio's spaghetti are, especially since they ate it for free. Igor, noticing their vacant stares, scratches his head. 
Sireneus: "This lazybones is wasting time to work less!". 
Clementinus: "Surely, this is a trick to avoid work!". 
Igor: "Sorry! You certainly are true masters…".
Igor lowers his head and returns to work, muttering: "Yes, yes! Masters… of escaping from the restaurant!"

No evidence for the conspiracy.

If the conspiracy we’re talking about was true, we should find:

Anonymous copies of the Gospels,
Copies with different titles,
Copies attributed to different authors,
An alternative tradition.

But none of that has ever been found. While we have lot of evidence supporting the traditional authors; the alleged conspiracy left no trace. Consequently, it remains merely a hypothesis contradicted by the actual evidence.

As if nothing happened, the fathers continue their discussion… 
Papaya: "Do we have to pay royalties to use the apostles names?". 
Sireneus: "I don't know. We should ask their grandchildren...". 
Clementinus: "Careful! They might sue us!". 
But that year, the offerings had been few. With the invention of the donuts, the brothers had started eating too many and developing diabetes. Once, in church, Papaya had tried to dissuade them, showing them medical evidence during one of his sermons. 
Papaya: "… So we have seen, with evidence, that donuts are harmful! Stop eating too many, or you'll get diabetes!". 
But Jack the elder, angry and infuriated, had stood up: "Brothers and Sisters! Don't listen to this charlatan! Donuts are harmless and delicious!". Then everyone had rushed to the bakery, leaving Papaya preaching alone.
So, sighing, Papaya concludes: "Well, sometimes the truth is more bitter than a bitter donut!". 
Sireneus: "Sorry Papaya! But bitter donuts don't exist!". 
Clementinus: "That's right! Donuts are… harmless and delicious!"

The churches were independent.

If we trace the history of the Church, we will never find a leader capable of controlling all the churches in the world. The leaders of the time could not agree even on secondary issues. For example, in the second century, Anicetus, bishop of Rome, and Polycarp, bishop of Smyrna, meet to decide when to celebrate Easter. After many discussions, the only thing they agree is that they disagree. So both go back home, leaving the issue unresolved. This shows how the influence of the church leaders was geographically limited.

To be considered.

As we have seen, the churches were independent and it was not easy for them to agree.
The church did not choose some books to give authority to. Instead, they recognized that some books in use had authority. When the time came to compile a list of books for the New Testament, they used criteria to recognize whether a certain book had the authority of the Scriptures. Those criteria, called Biblical Canon, basically are:

The book was from the apostles,
It was consistent with the rest of the Scriptures,
It was used and approved by the church.

By those criteria also anonymous books like Hebrews were recognized as scriptures. Christians did not accept any doctrine, they checked the evidence of their origin. We can see an example of that process, in the words of Papias when he talks about how he chose his sources.

The meeting seems to be at a standstill...
Papaya: "Here's my idea. To convince them all, we won't need... to convince them all!".
Sireneus: "Papaya, I told you not to have that prosecco when we were there at Sergio's!".
Papaya: "You haven't understood me! We'll convince Anicetus!".
Clementinus: "He didn't have a prosecco... He had a sambuca! He's talking about the anise in it!".
Papaya: "Stop it! Now I'm getting angry!".
Tortellinus: "Stay calm! it's the alcohol taking on you!".
Papaya: "Listen carefully! Anicetus is the head of the church in Rome. All Christians listen to him!".
Igor imagined them dressed as elves, riding unicorns, flying away from reality!

Let’s simulate this conspiracy.

To understand it better, we want to absurdly pretend that the conspiracy existed and simulate it.

The decision.

The churches of the second century are using anonymous gospels as Scriptures. Nobody knows who wrote them, until a group of church fathers gathers and decides to attribute them to the apostles with the aim of giving them more authority.

The choices.

The church fathers choose and agree on the four authors. Except the choice of the apostle John, the other three are very strange. The most obvious choice should fall on Peter, James, or some important apostle. Instead they choose Matthew, who is a less important disciple. According to the tradition they would have invented, Matthew wrote for the Jews. But, reading his Gospel, we learn that he was a former tax collector. But this professional figure was hated by the Jews, who were his primary audience. The fathers also choose Luke and Mark who were apostolic collaborators but not eyewitnesses. In Acts we read that Mark, had caused a quarrel between Paul and Barnabas. Since the same tradition states that Mark used Peter’s sermons, wouldn’t it have been easier to attribute Mark’s gospel directly to Peter? These choices, in conclusion, are strange and ineffective. Why would the conspirators choose these authors?

First problem: convincing everyone.

After deciding the authors, they have to convince thousands of churches, scattered throughout the ancient world, to accept their particular attribution. In the second century, the churches are independent, and there is no central control. In the second century, there is not a human leader capable to control or influence all the churches of the ancient world.

Second problem: getting rid of the evidence.

As we have said, nowadays there is no trace of this conspiracy. So, to make it work, the church fathers must get rid of thousands of anonymous manuscripts already widespread and circulating in the churches of every geographical location. They must find them one by one and ensure that they are corrected or destroyed.

Third problem: silencing the witnesses.

From one day to the next, the anonymous gospels have an author. Millions of Christians testify to this event. Yet no one speaks. In fact, today there is no tradition for which the gospels were initially anonymous. So, to make the plan work, the conspirators convince all the Christians, one by one, to keep their mouths shut.

Fourth problem: non-Christian owners of anonymous copies.

In addition to having enough influence to convince every single Christian to obey them, they must also have enough to convince non-Christians in the same way. Indeed, there are surely individuals outside the church, including opponents of the movement, who possess copies of the anonymous gospels. Copies are likely found in ancient libraries, such as Pergamum. How will the church fathers accomplish this task?

Finally, the plan is ready...
Papaya: "Here are the authors we have chosen...".
Papaya lists the authors they have chosen for the four gospels.
Sireneus: "How will we convince everyone?".
Papaya: "See? It's easy: we'll offer them... a doughnut!".
Clementinus: "Brilliant! No one will refuse!".
Tortellinus: "Let me think... Surely this plan is... perfect!".
Sireneus: "How will we correct all the manuscripts?".
Papaya: "We'll sneak into the churches at night... disguised as... ninjas!".
Clementinus: "You're a genius!".
Tortellinus: "We'll call ourselves the patri-ninjas!".
Igor: "Congratulations! You mixed Santa Claus, Halloween, and the story of the Titanic into one plan!".
Papaya: "I don't get it! What do those things have to do with our plan?".
Igor: "You see, to sneak into the churches secretly, you'll come down the chimney like Santa Claus and dress up in a fancy costume, like children do at Halloween.".
Sireneus: "Yes... But the Titanic, what does it have to do with it?".
Igor: "After saying this absurd plan aloud, like the Titanic, you've really... hit rock bottom!".

Tragic ending: the conspirators are discovered.

The most likely ending to this story is a tragic one, in which the conspirators are discovered and relieved of their duties with dishonor. The conspirators lose all their influence and all the work of a lifetime. In an alternative future, in modern times, the story of this failed plan reaches us through the words of some ancient author. Manuscripts with different titles and authors are found. In the works of other church fathers, we find discussions about the Gospels similar to that ones on Hebrews.

The patri-ninjas, having fired Igor for his insolence, as evening falls, while everyone is at home in front of the TV, sneak into the churches to correct the manuscripts. 
Clementinus: "What were we supposed to do?".
Papaya: "You have to add the title!".
Tortellinus: "Oh no! I forgot the ink at home!".
Papaya: "How could you? It was the most important thing!".
Sireneus: "Look! Someone has already corrected the manuscripts!".
Papaya: "How is that possible?".
Clementinus: "Guys! There's something even more important that we forgot?".
Papaya: "What?".
Clementinus: "We booked at Sergio's! We are late!".
So they leave everything and rush to the restaurant...
Clementinus: "Why is everyone staring at us?".
Sireneus: "The ninja costumes! We didn't take them off!".
Tortellinus: "Oh no! They'll guess what we've done!".
Papaya: "You know what? I've decided to confess everything and resign!".
Sireneus: "What will become of our careers?!".
Clementinus: "Don't worry! We'll find an easier job and continue with the spaghetti feasts!".
Tortellinus: "I agree, and I've already found the name for our team. We'll call ourselves... The Spaghetti Gang!".

Happy ending? A futile conspiracy.

The church fathers go through all this trouble and the conspiracy succeeds perfectly. But then they pause for a moment to reflect and remember the Letter to the Hebrews. Like the Gospels, it is widespread and used in all churches. Hebrews is already part of the Scriptures and has the same authority as the Gospels. according to Christians: Scriptures are inspired by the Holy Spirit. So the conspirators realize that they have gone to all this trouble for nothing. In fact, there was no need to lie about the authorship of the Gospels. They already had the authority of the Scriptures from the beginning. In our simulation, therefore, the church fathers learn a lesson: it is not men who give authority to the Scriptures, but God.

The next day they show up at church. Papaya has changed is mind, and is talking to the others in the back room before starting the sermon.
Papaya: "Guys! So we all agree. We'll go ahead with the plan!".
The other three nod.
Papaya: "Good! I'm going to make the announcement!".
Papaya steps onto the pulpit, facing the large congregation.
Papaya: "Brothers and sisters! Until yesterday, the Gospels were anonymous, but from today they have authors, these are Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John.".
The congregation laughs. By an unlikely coincidence, they had chosen the true authors of the Gospels. For the congregation, it's obvious that those are the authors of the Gospels, and they think Papaya is telling a joke.
Papaya, looking puzzled, continues: "And whoever agrees with me, will be rewarded with... a doughnut!"

The Gospels meet the Biblical Canon.

At the end of the second century, the Biblical Canon is recognized. We have seen that it is a list of criteria, used by the Church, to recognize if a book belongs to the Scriptures. Let’s apply those criteria to the Gospels.

Apostolic origin: when we read the Gospels, we find some details. Details that only someone very close to Jesus could report. Someone like one of the apostles.
Used by Christians: when we read the works from the church fathers we realize that the Gospels are the most quoted books. We find so many quotes in them, that if we had lost the Gospels, we could reconstruct them using those quotations. This shows us that the four Gospels were widespread, accepted, and used by all the churches in the second century world.
Consistency with the Scriptures: the doctrines in the Gospels are consistent with the rest of the Bible. For example, The death of Jesus for our sin, and his resurrection, were predicted by the prophets in the Old Testament.

Since the Gospels meet the Biblical Canon, they would have been added to the New Testament in any case. Also if they were anonymous like Hebrew. So they were already considered part of the Scriptures, and the conspiracy would have been pointless.

Papaya has finished his sermon and introduces the next preacher...
Papaya: "Now, as usual, Jack the elder will deliver a sermon".
Jack steps up to the pulpit, thanks Papaya, and begins: "Brothers and sisters! I would like to thank our dear Papaya for making us laugh with his joke about the anonymous Gospels and for introducing the topic of my sermon on the authorship of the Gospels...".
Jack continues presenting all the evidence, and Papaya, along with the other three conspirators, are left speechless.
Igor, chuckling, seated among the pews, thinks: "Papaya and his friends have always been distracted during sermons. They were only thinking about spaghetti. I hope this time, Jack's words sink in as well as... Sergio's spaghetti usually does!"

Let’s analyse the chances of success.

Using the five points for a successful conspiracy, let’s examine this crazy plan.

Few Participants: We don’t know their number, but we need an influential leader for each area of the ancient world. By the mid-second century, there were 12 provinces under the control of the Roman Empire. Still twelve is a too large number.
Rapid and Frequent Communication among Conspirators: In the second century, it’s impossible to communicate quickly over distances.
Short Duration: The conspiracy continues until every trace is eliminated. This requires years of work.
Strong Bonds among Conspirators: The church fathers are colleagues and friends. Those bonds aren’t strong enough to support such a complex conspiracy.
Low Psychological Pressure: If the conspiracy were discovered, there would be serious consequences for the conspirators, including the loss of positions and influence, as well as a great shame.

In conclusion, this conspiracy has no chance of success. Furthermore, since it is useless, there isn’t even a concrete motive for the conspirators.

The sermon ends, and Papaya and his friends pretend everything is fine. Back in their room, they discuss the events.
Papaya: "So the Church has always known who wrote the Gospels! Now I understand why Sergio reacted the way he did...".
We flashback to a few days earlier. The four ninjas are at Sergio's, as usual...
Sergio: "Here's the bill! Don't try any tricks this time!".
Papaya: "Sergio... I have a question for you...".
Sergio: "The answer is no! We don't do credit here!".
Papaya pays and explains the plan to Sergio in detail.
Papaya: "...so? What do you think? What are our chances of success?".
Sergio thinks for a moment, looks them in the eye, and responds... with a loud raspberry!
Then he quickly escorts them out with the following recommendation: "And don't come back!"

Conclusion.

Therefore, we find that the Gospels follow the style of many other works of the time, which explains why the author only appears in the title. We have also seen that tradition exhaustively explains why the traditional authors found themselves writing the Gospels. Finally, we have observed that the theory of Gospels written by unknown authors is not supported by concrete evidence, and that the plan to carry out the conspiracy was unfeasible, pointless, and extremely risky for the conspirators. We can therefore assert with certainty that the Gospels were written by the traditional authors.

Thank you for reading, and goodbye until the next post!