Serial Liar
Three scientists — Papaia, Banani, and Ravioli — and their assistant Igor work at NASAL. When they start showing interest in creationism, their superiors send them to a psychologist for evaluation. The psychologist, Professor Faggioli, is a shady character determined to get them fired by making them seem insane. The first to enter is Ravioli.
We’re in Professor Faggioli’s office, where Ravioli is talking about how, back in afterschool care, he managed to avoid punishment by hiding fish in his backpack.
Faggioli: So, just to recap, you said your stress eating began with a nightmare, where a giant boiled fish was chasing you.
Ravioli: Yes, exactly.
Faggioli: And you also said your mother forced you to eat things like broccoli and fish, which you didn’t like.
Ravioli: That’s right.
Faggioli: And finally, you added that at afterschool you were forced to do the same thing — eat fish and broccoli — or you’d get punished.
Ravioli: Unfortunately, yes.
Faggioli: But eventually, you came up with a trick to avoid eating and still not get punished — hiding the fish in your backpack.
Ravioli: Pretty much, yes.
Faggioli: But obviously you knew what you were doing was wrong — actually, two things: first, not eating perfectly good fish, and second, lying to your mother and your teachers. How did you feel about that?
Ravioli: Well, of course I felt a little bad about lying… but definitely better than having to eat that garbage or sit in punishment for hours. And after a while… I got used to it.
Faggioli: You became a serial liar.
Ravioli (uneasy): I thought that term was only used for killers…
Faggioli: No. It’s also for liars. Serial liars. People like you!
Ravioli: Okay, fine, no need to repeat it…
Too late. Faggioli has already pulled the sock puppet out of his drawer.
Tony: Serial liar! Serial liar! Serial liar!
Faggioli: That’s enough, Tony! Try to keep a professional tone.
Faggioli laughs to himself.
Igor (voice-over): Professional tone? Maybe the psychologist studied… but the sock? Who gave him a degree?
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…Oh, wait… now I get it: Tony… tone-y…
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…Genius, Faggioli! Next time you’re booked for my Friday night comedy show.
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…Anyway… Faggioli says Ravioli is a serial liar, but he doesn’t seem to like that label…
Maybe we should call him a “creative storyteller with digestive issues.”
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