Three scientists\u2014Papaia, Banani, and Ravioli\u2014and their assistant Igor work at the NASAL observatory. They come across some interesting books and start getting into creationism. But their bosses don\u2019t like this new interest and send them to take a psychological test, which they must pass to keep their jobs. But the psychologist, Professor Faggioli, determined to get them fired, does everything he can to make them look insane.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n We are in Professor Faggioli’s office, where Ravioli is being evaluated.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: Anyway, dear Ravioli, we can try to manage the effects of your stress eating, but to do so, it\u2019s important to understand its origins and reasons, so we can resolve this little psychological issue of yours.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli: I didn\u2019t think this was a psychological problem…<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: Unfortunately, it is, Ravioli. Unfortunately, it is. Anyway… Tell me. When was the first time you became aware of your stress eating?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli (scratching his chin): Let me think\u2026 Ah, yes! It was when I was eight. My parents put me on a diet. They made me eat dishes made of broccoli.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli makes a disgusted face.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli (interested): Broccoli? Did you say broccoli?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli: Yes, exactly, broccoli.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: Broccoli? Those delicious, wholesome green vegetables?<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli: Ah, I wish I could see it that way too, professor. But the truth is, I hate broccoli. I\u2019ve never liked them, and I\u2019ve never been able to stand them!<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli (astonished): But, Ravioli… how can you say such a thing? Don\u2019t you know broccoli are tasty and good for you?<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli: Now, professor, you\u2019ve just used the same words my mom would say when she forced me to swallow those horrible green bites! I almost threw up.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: Now, now, Raviolino! You\u2019re really trying to make me angry! Didn\u2019t I just tell you broccoli are delicious and healthy?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli: Professor, you just called me Raviolino\u2026 Just like my mom does!<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: You see, Ravioli, this isn\u2019t a matter of taste or opinion. Broccoli\u2026 you have to eat them!<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli (confused): I\u2019m not so sure, professor\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: What you\u2019re telling me is very serious! Don\u2019t you realize your mother was right?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli (alarmed): What? What\u2019s this about?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: Don\u2019t you know? Ah, never mind. You said your mom used to force you to eat broccoli. Tell me how it went.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli: Well, there\u2019s not much to say. At lunchtime, I ate at afterschool care, but dinner\u2026 Dinner was the worst. Dinnertime would come, and on the table, there were always\u2026 broccoli! And if I didn\u2019t finish the whole plate, I\u2019d get punished.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: On your knees on dry beans or ruler slaps on your hands?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli: No, Faggioli, what are you saying? My mom never used those kinds of punishments! My punishment was having to listen to endless lectures about how good vegetables are for you.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: Ah, I see. Now it\u2019s all clear. I\u2019m starting to understand why you\u2019ve ended up in such bad shape! It was actually your mom who was too soft.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli: Am I really in such bad shape, professor?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Time passes, and Faggioli continues his lecture\u2026 I mean, his session with Ravioli.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: And yet, you like pizza\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli: Exactly! How did you guess?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: I know your type all too well!<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli: Now that I think about it, I\u2019m hungry.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: And you\u2019d like a nice pizza, thick, dripping with cheese and oil, topped with plenty of spicy salami slices\u2026 right?<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli: Ah, my favorite\u2026 but at this time, the pizzeria is closed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: It\u2019s only nine in the morning\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli: Ah, but there\u2019s that bakery downtown\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: Or maybe a big hamburger\u2026 double, or triple\u2026 loaded with sauces\u2026 an absurd amount of fried bacon and cheddar\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli: Professor, don\u2019t tempt me like that. It\u2019s only nine in the morning. The fast-food places are only serving breakfast at this hour\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: Of course, Ravioli, you like these things. And do you know why?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli (interested): I don\u2019t know, Professor. Why?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: You like them because they\u2019re\u2026 JUNK!<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli jumps, startled by Faggioli\u2019s shout.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: Can\u2019t you see it? You\u2019re missing out on good, wholesome broccoli dishes, which are great for your body and mind, and instead, you\u2019re putting garbage into your body! Things that harm you, make you gain weight, and bloat your stomach like a balloon!<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli: Yeah, but pizzas and hamburgers are\u2026 so good!<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: Good? And you call that stuff good?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli: I don\u2019t know, Professor. Maybe you\u2019re right\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: Maybe? Do you even realize what that junk has done to you? Have you looked in the mirror? Haven\u2019t you seen how fat and ugly you\u2019ve become? And let\u2019s not even talk about your arteries\u2014surely clogged with cholesterol!<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli starts crying.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: But broccoli, now those are good! That\u2019s what I call a healthy food! Ah, broccoli! They bring back so many childhood memories. Did you know, Ravioli, that I was a little rebel like you, refusing to eat broccoli? But then my father\u2026 Ah, my father\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli gets lost for a moment in childhood memories.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: \u2026 My father used to smack my hands with a ruler. Oh yes! That worked. I remember evenings spent kneeling on dry beans, nights locked in the storage closet. Hungry, in the dark, and without dinner. And let me tell you\u2026 crying and screaming didn\u2019t help one bit!<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli pauses, gets up, and looks at the wall, pretending it\u2019s a window. Then he resumes his monologue.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: And look at me now! Look at my body\u2014slim, athletic, and full of health. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n … Look at my mind\u2014sharp, sound, and disciplined. <\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n …And who deserves the credit?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli pulls out the old sock he uses as a puppet\u2014his friend Tony.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Tony: I don\u2019t know, Faggioli. Who deserves the credit?<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: BROCCOLI!<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Tony: And the beatings! Ah, ah, ah!<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: Yes, exactly, broccoli and the beatings!<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli has pulled himself together.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Ravioli: You\u2019re right, Faggioli. I\u2019m a mess!<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli: Good, good, good. I see we\u2019re making progress. Right, Tony?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Tony: Ah, ah, ah! The fatty is making progress\u2026 Ah, ah, ah! Careful he doesn\u2019t overdo it\u2026 Ah, ah, ah! Because he\u2019s fat! Ah, ah, ah!<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n Faggioli (encouragingly): But let\u2019s get back to you, dear Ravioli\u2026 Go on, you were telling me about the first time you felt this nervous hunger\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n Igor later commented: On one hand, Ravioli realized he was a mess. On the other hand, Faggioli didn\u2019t realize he was one bad day away from being a full-on psychopath. Which one would you choose?<\/p>\n\n\n\n \ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23\ud83e\udd23<\/p>\n\n\n\n